By Susan Tromanhauser
Beth Brundage has a very specific Mothers’ Day celebration in mind – dinner out with the family.
But this isn’t Brundage’s first Mothers’ Day, so she has tempered her expectations to be a celebration of “peaceful chaos,” incorporating making car ramps out of menus to keep her four-year-old son, Thatcher, busy while tending to the needs of newborn son, Jace. Her Mothers’ Day will also be divided between the boys’ two grandmothers, ensuring they receive their kudos for the support they provide.
Brundage’s recollection of her first Mothers’ Day in 2021 is very hazy, saying now she, “is different; the boys are different.” Her first Mothers’ Day, in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic, felt isolated and emotional. She suffered from post-partum depression, afraid to leave her baby with anyone else and yet afraid to take him to the grocery store in case he cried and caused a scene.
Her mother was a big support, as was her medical team of Haliburton & Bancroft Midwives and her family physician. They all supported her, ensuring she received proper treatment through medication and therapy. Brundage explains treatment helped her recover to a point, but it was once she was able to return to the gym and start exercising, she really felt some relief.
This time, maternity leave is quite different than her first leave with Thatcher. With her firstborn she took time away from her position as an education assistant at an elementary school. With newborn Jace, she has yet to take time off – from her family responsibilities or her job. As a result, Jace is already well-traveled. At two days old, he attended Thatcher’s skating lesson and he accompanies his mom while she takes his big brother to speech therapy in Bracebridge.
Now office manager of the family business, The Dock Shop, there is no time for a maternity leave. She is busy keeping the staff of five, plus her husband, in line while the young mother juggles all things customer relations. She did forewarn customers she might not return calls as quickly as before, and that emails might arrive at all hours of the night. Brundage credits the flexibility of her job as being the primary reason she is able to fit everything into her day.
While she is doing a busy job of tending to a newborn, Brundage manages to connect with the outside world by going to Castle Antiques in Haliburton. There she “can just sit and people watch” or set up her laptop and work, and connect to other people. Brundage ignores advice to sleep while the baby sleeps, saying nothing would get done if she did that, but admits she sometimes uses naptimes to binge Netflix.
Watching Brundage comfortably cuddle her month-old baby Jace, it is easy to see she loves her role as mom. In a comfy café chair, she embraces her newborn, peacefully asleep in her arms. She also sips her afternoon coffee treat, acknowledging sleep can be difficult and caffeine helps.
At the café, she is able to hold an adult conversation with the only interruption a greeting from a friendly face entering the café. Brundage smiles and says now that she lives in Haliburton “she can’t go anywhere without knowing someone” and admits enjoying the smaller town to the city of Peterborough, where she grew up, which to her “seems too busy now.”
Brundage truly believes in the adage “it takes a village to raise a child” and is appreciative of all the support she receives in her community.
Advice for other mothers? Brundage is adamant the most important thing she has learned as a mother is the necessity to take time for yourself. “If a mother doesn’t take care of herself, she can’t take care of others,” she said.
She added feeling as if she is a different person now than before and every child is different. She admits there was a huge learning curve with her first child but this time she is more relaxed, more confident. And, as if on cue to prove her point, Jace stirs and immediately Brundage knows, “he’s hungry, it’s time for him to eat.”
But she is also quick to point out, as is the case with all mothers, “I’m still learning.”
